You Chose This Mess You Call Life, Now Un-Choose It!

Copyright  2013  Aleasa M. Word    All Rights Reserved

Life is not fair! How many times have I heard that? I’ve said it, heard it from co-workers and even from children.  What or who determines fair? Is it our pre-conceived notions based on our personal belief systems? Obviously so, because I’ve never seen a “BOOK OF FAIR” published and revised at the birth of every human being right. Fairness itself is always different for every person. Life IS simply what it IS until it changes.

Now with fairness out of the picture, what do we do about our life in general? Many have divorces, parenting issues, job crisis, financial crisis, health crisis and the list goes on. One client said “well I didn’t choose this, life chose it for me.”  I had to think about that for a while and really re-evaluate that statement.  It appeared that the issue at hand was one that randomly dropped in her lap and it did not seem FAIR for all intensive purposes. At the end of the day, self-chosen, fair or not – she had something to deal with.

So wasn’t that was the answer all along, “she had something to deal with?”’  As a coach, people frequent individuals in my field looking for answers. They want solutions to the problems and un-stickers for the stuck places in life. More than likely, the answers have always been there; but, we get bogged down by self-confidence issues that lead to fear and we forget to look for these answers. We have a choice in every situation yet often, we sit complacent waiting for the choice to jump out and grab us.  I like to compare this to building a house.  All of the materials have been ordered and even the right workers are in place but the house is not built. You must CHOOSE to pick up the tools and get to the task of building the house. If you don’t, all you have are workers, tools and bricks. 

With that said, I must ask, what is YOUR threshold for change? When do you decide YOU no longer want to be a project manager, managing the project of life that you were tasked to and decide to pick up the bricks, use the tools and direct the workers? Whether it is a divorce, unemployment or even financial concerns stop choosing the mess and the stress.  Instead, un-choose those and pick the solution for $2000 please! Living in denial or fear sends us into a whirlwind of self-induced paralysis that leads us to the city of “nothingness.”

Attitude, affects our motivation or lack thereof!  Yes it’s possible you’ve had a hard time. It seems as if things that are not I your control have found their way to your doorstep. True, true, true! But does it have to stay that way? Heck NO!!!! On this day stop choosing to live in the squalor of filth and chaos (lies, guilt, jealousy, fear, disorganization, procrastination) and build the damn house! This is your life and you have every right to be happy even if you used to be one of the meanest, cold-hearted people in the world. Yesterday is in your past unless you continue to drag it into your future like a bag of dirty socks adding no value with a stash of hidden motives on the side.

Take this moment to reflect on what you have been choosing or in the coaching world known as tolerating and UN-CHOOSE the mess, lose the stress, and become the best you can be!

Be blessed!